https://jamesgordonpsych.co.uk James Gordon Private Practice Fri, 10 May 2019 17:01:22 +0000 https://jamesgordonpsych.co.uk en https://jamesgordonpsych.co.uk/Existential-Therapy Fri, 10 May 2019 16:32:36 +0000 James Gordon Private Practice https://jamesgordonpsych.co.uk/Existential-Therapy Home&nbsp; /&nbsp; Existential Psychotherapy&nbsp; /&nbsp; Bio&nbsp; /&nbsp; Articles /&nbsp; Psychotherapy in N4 &nbsp; Existential Psychotherapy Existential Psychotherapy is a grand-sounding name for a straightforward set of ideas That we are a unique, individual bit of being, a creative centre of perception and action in the universe. That we all have our own unique lens through which we relate to and understand the world. That this lens is always being re-shaped by the things we encounter and the choices we make in respect of them. That these choices are, nonetheless, made within limits over which we have no control: when, where and to whom we were born; the will of other people; our finite cognitive capacities; change, ageing, sickness and death. Consequently, Existential Therapy offers to provides a relationship that gives one the chance to put everything on the table, encounter the lens that we use make sense of the world and understand its contribution to the dilemmas we currently experience. Paradoxically, when we know ourselves better, we are better able to make changes. https://jamesgordonpsych.co.uk/Biography Fri, 10 May 2019 17:01:22 +0000 James Gordon Private Practice https://jamesgordonpsych.co.uk/Biography Home&nbsp; /&nbsp; Existential Psychotherapy&nbsp; /&nbsp; Bio&nbsp; /&nbsp; Articles&nbsp; / &nbsp;Psychotherapy in N4&nbsp; Biography I am an accredited Existential Psychotherapist and Chartered Psychologist. My therapeutic practise arises from a life-long interest in philosophy, social sciences and the humanities, with particular attraction to questions concerning the nature of society and the nature of individual subjectivity. Consequently I believe that the psychotherapeutic enterprise offers radical new possibilities for an individual to understand where they position themselves in their life and how that position can be changed. It offers a real opportunity for a client to put everything on the table and to take seriously the creativity and power that is our birthright as human beings. This is best achieved through an honest and compassionate space where one can talk about and, therefore, think about oneself in a new way. I have worked in the NHS for 6 years in a range of services, including Guys and St Thomas’s Psycho-oncology service and North Hackney Community Mental Health Team. I am LGBT-friendly and specialise in anxiety and trauma disorders, disability, employment and education difficulties, loss and bereavement, self-esteem and relationship difficulties. <img src="https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/98a4ff3df99b43a7dd40dfca9a9cedc5c92dd5c92e5989c061366e2d5effd248/Fil.jpg" alt="James"> https://jamesgordonpsych.co.uk/Psychotherapy-in-Crouch-End Fri, 10 May 2019 17:01:09 +0000 James Gordon Private Practice https://jamesgordonpsych.co.uk/Psychotherapy-in-Crouch-End Home&nbsp; /&nbsp; Existential Psychotherapy&nbsp; /&nbsp; Bio&nbsp; /&nbsp; Articles /&nbsp; Psychotherapy in N4 &nbsp;&nbsp; Counselling Psychology and Psychotherapy in Finsbury Park I offer Counselling Psychology and Existential Psychotherapy at my practice in Albert Mews. This is a 4 minute walk from Crouch Hill Station, a 10 minute walk from Finsbury Park Station and 1 minute walk from the Albert Road bus stop for the bus routes W3, W7 and 210. Existential Psychotherapy provides the space for a person to find a new philosophical approach to their suffering and to understand the choices they have to grow from it. I offer one-to-one or couples Existential Psychotherapy to those who feel the time has come to re-think your relationships to yourself and others. I am registered and accredited as a psychotherapist by the United Kingdom Council for Psychotherapy (UKCP) which is the UK’s leading accrediting body for psychotherapists. My registration is conditional upon my adherence to their professional standards, which can be found by clicking the logo below. <img src="https://www.psychotherapy.org.uk/assets/img/logo.svg" ,="" a="" href="https://www.psychotherapy.org.uk/media/v11peyoh/ukcp-code-of-ethics-and-professional-practice-2019.pdf" width="384px," height="215px," data-caption="United Kingdom Council for Psychotherapy Accredited" style="width: 384px; height: 215px;"> I am a Chartered Psychologist. This means the UK’s registration body for psychologists, the British Psychological Society (BPS), recognise my training and experience meets the standards for the practice of Counselling Psychologist in the UK. I am also recognised as a Counselling Psychologist by The Health and Care and Professions Council (HCPC), the UK’s regulator of the Allied Health Professions. <img src="https://cdn.memiah.co.uk/uploads/counselling-directory.org.uk/68980/original/asset_5eba879d4a887.png" ,="" a="" href="http://www.bps.org.uk" width="384px," height="215px," style="width: 384px; height: 215px;">&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp;&nbsp;<img src="https://www.hcpc-uk.org/Static/images/logo@2x.png" ,="" a="" href="https://www.hcpc-uk.org/" width="384px," style="width: 384px;"> If you would like to begin working with me: Assessment: Our work will begin with an assessment session, this is to allow you to meet me, for you to outline your difficulties and for us both to agree upon whether we would like to proceed to work together. From then on sessions will take place on a regular weekly basis. Fee: My fee is £90 per session - I do have low-cost slots available, do ask me about these if you are in financial difficulties and want to proceed with treatment. Availability: My clinic runs on Tuesdays, Wednesdays and Thursdays from 2pm-9pm (last session will begin at 8pm.) Cancellation: If you need to cancel a session, please contact me as soon as possible. Unless there is a health or unavoidable reason, I will charge you the fee for the session if you do not give me notice within 48 hours. Accessibility: Stairs (with a handrail) are required to gain entrance to my clinic on the first floor of the building. Finding the Clinic: My clinic is located at Unit 6 Albert Mews, Albert Road, London N4 3RD. This is a 4 minute walk from Crouch Hill Station, a 10 minute walk from Finsbury Park Station and 1 minute walk from the Albert Road bus stop for the bus routes W3, W7 and 210. Contact: Please contact me on 07712176338 or jamesgordonpsych@gmail.com for any enquiries. https://jamesgordonpsych.co.uk/How-to-Support-a-Friend Fri, 10 May 2019 17:01:15 +0000 James Gordon Private Practice https://jamesgordonpsych.co.uk/How-to-Support-a-Friend Home&nbsp; /&nbsp; Existential Psychotherapy&nbsp; /&nbsp; Bio&nbsp; /&nbsp; Articles /&nbsp; Psychotherapy in N4 &nbsp; Articles Self-published unless otherwise stated: How to support a friend who is suffering from mental distress 13 January 2021 I am frequently asked for advice concerning the best way to help a friend through a mental health crisis or in supporting a friend to manage their mental health difficulties. The experience of anxiety, depression, trauma or psychosis can be frightening and isolating. It is natural to want to do something to try to alleviate your friend’s suffering, and also to feel a little bit out of depth, perhaps worrying about saying the wrong thing and making things worse. Here I offer a few rules of thumb that should help you avoid common pitfalls and become better at supporting your friend. Do not be in and out Consistency is crucial. Research has shown that what makes a friendship beneficial for mental health is not the determined by the number of good deeds done, or hours spent together – but the expectation that someone will be there in the future. A common mistake at the beginning of a mental health episode or during a crisis is for a supporter to feel that they must suddenly ramp up their involvement with their friend, to be extremely generous and available and to make up for every person who has let their friend down. This ramping up can be counter-productive, as it is based upon an unrealistic expectation of what an individual can provide – you will likely become jaded and even resentful of the friend for not improving as a result of your enlarged efforts to help. What would be of greater benefit is the maintenance of your present level of involvement in the face of your friend’s changeable need. This will be tricky enough in itself. Sometimes it may be the case that your efforts may seem to be spurned, it is best not to take this personally and to send messages by text or other Instant Messenger services that you are thinking of them. Make a space for “real-talk”- but don’t demand it On top of the experience of challenging thoughts and behaviours people also often feel considerable shame and embarrassment at their difficulty in coping with day to day life. Quite often people with mental health difficulties will compare their circumstances unfavourably with key people in their life. As a friend you may notice that your friend is not doing so well, but that they may also be unwilling to tell you exactly what is going on. Some people do not expect to be taken seriously or that some topics are even valid to open up about. What is important is that you are able to show your friend that you are willing to listen without making a demand upon them. Doing an activity together, be it gardening, DIY or driving in a car together could be a good way to take the awkwardness out of it for both of you, as you won’t need to attempt eye-contact. Simple statements like: “I’ve noticed that you don’t seem to be doing so well,” or “you appear to be less happy lately” – “I’m not an expert but I am your friend and I want to be a good friend to you.” Please do not take offence if your friend is hesitant – your goal here is to open up a possibility of connection, which they may decide to take up at a later stage. Do not worry too much about saying the wrong thing – your friend will be able to sense your genuine good-will and willingness to share their burdens for their sake. Try to avoid thinking of your friend’s mental health problem as an enemy to be defeated Our wishes for our friend’s recovery and possible return to a pre-mentally unwell state can sometimes get in the way of accepting them and being there for them as they are now. I would advise against checking in with your friend in a manner that seeks to measure the extent of symptoms on a day-to-day basis. Your friend might interpret this as impatience or judgement about their recovery; that you are more interested in banishing the symptoms than being an accepting friend. You may also deny your friend the opportunity to have a normal good day without having to worry about their symptoms. Try to avoid taking on the challenge of vanquishing the condition yourself, mental illnesses are highly personal, changeable and often touch on areas which are hard (or painful) to explain. However good your intentions, it is unlikely that your attempts to effect psychological treatment will be sufficient in themselves and you may grow frustrated in your friend’s seeming recalcitrance. Your responsive company, friendship and the expectation that you will be a safe harbour will be so much more valuable to your friend than your efforts to try to motivate them, overcome their fears and get them happy again. Similarly, do encourage your friend to seek help and offer assistance in contacting local health services if this is what they want. However, demanding that they do so can be counter-productive for the reasons described above. If your friend is engaged with services, try not to pry too much into what is discussed or decided beyond the level they are willing to share with you. If your friend discontinues treatment abruptly, try to find out what specifically wasn’t working and encourage your friend to be find other sources of support e.g. a different therapist, a second opinion on medication, How to be with challenging behaviour/ emotional experiences You are likely at some stage to see the worst of the symptom – be it a sense of hopelessness, an inexplicable inability to do something that seems perfunctory, intense sadness, possibly anger. What is important in most instances is to be patient, calm and to not try to force anything. Ask your friend what they need at this moment, and try to facilitate this or be there with them in a compassionate and understanding manner. Your friend will be feeling very stuck in a hole at this moment, having you down there, sitting in the hole together until the worst passes will, in time be viewed as a valuable testament to your friendship. Try to let them be in control of the situation as much as they can – however do get them medical assistance if needed. If in doubt – be a friend. To contact me you can send me an email: jamesgordonpsych@gmail.com or phone me: 07712176338&nbsp;